so, i went to my first and second weekly appointments. and i'm feeling nice and guilty. because although the first week was 100% successful and no cheating occurred and i lost EIGHT pounds, my second week didn't follow suit.
i baked gingerbread people. and made my reindeer crunch (3 types of chex cereal, pretzels, cheerios and chocolate m&m's covered in white chocolate) and i ate bread. and pasta. and tomatoes.
though i still lost 2 more pounds, i'm pretty grumpy. and i'm getting especially so because i can't have tomatoes in my salad but twice a week. TOMATOES! ug.
and then each little box has 6 $4 packets of protein food that doesn't taste so bad, but it all starts to taste the same. and then i have to check in once a week with my coach who has decided to bump me up to phase 2 even though i have not reached 90% of my goal weight loss. I've only lost about 25% of the weight i want to take off.
and when i look at it like that, the numbers are motivating. but i believe i'm going to lose my mind. there is all this candy and sweet stuff everywhere! AHHHHH!!!!
but the good news is that i haven't gained any weight this holiday season.
really, this is all a means to an end, and i have to keep telling myself that there is an end to this diet. i will go back to "real" food.
and, no. i'm not delusional. i know that unlimited splenda and meal replacements and no whole grains isn't exactly worthy of a "health nut" stamp. but the idea, for me, is to get to a healthy weight so i can start maintaining versus continue to creep up as i had been doing.
i would eventually like to get pregnant again, and my joints can't take the pregnancy weight seeing as how they are suffering now. i was also preeclamptic during the last trimester of my first pregnancy. bad for baby. bad for mama.
so no matter how much i want to jump off, i need to stay on. i will set tiny goals every week of 2 pounds. so this friday, i'll see what i've done.
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